DOUBLE DATING IN RELATIONSHIPS

In present society, dating or courtship (whichever concept that suits you) has become prevalent that almost everyone is involved in it. From teenagers to adults, intimate relationship is one topic that is always on our daily discussion menu. From breakups to makeups, from engagement to weddings – the transition is simply that fluid. Ordinarily, intimate relationship is supposed to be between two consenting adults but that idea is almost an expired one. Today, boys and girls, men and women are increasingly engaged in what is referred to as “double-dating”. In this piece, we are going to explain the concept of double-dating, the reason why many are engaged in it, benefits and the dangers of such behaviour.

What is Relationship? 

First, relationship here means a connection of intimacy existing between two or more people which usually involves romance. The involved individuals most depend on each other for emotional, spiritual and material comfort. Many relationships often take off with friendship, a date, courtship and possibly marriage. Marriage being the highest form of relationship.

Double-dating

Dating period often is a time when relationship is when the individuals assess each other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. The concept of double-dating is a coinage that describes a situation where an individual is involved in more than one relationship. This could mean multiple dating as the case may be. In today’s society, even married individuals have been alleged to be involved in multiple relationships. We therefore decided to sort people’s opinions regarding the reason why double-dating has become prevalent.

Why people double-date

There are many reasons why individuals engage in double-dating. As suggested by sampled respondents, the reasons varies and almost the same for both gender.

Uncertain Relationship (trust issue): there is the believe that many are unsure of the commitment of their partner. Because of this, they often decide on what many refer to as “back up” or “spare tyre” relationship. This in case of any eventuality with the main person (break up), they will fall back on the back up or spare partner.

Comparison of Characters: Individuals usually look out for certain qualities in their partners. They engage in double-dating to compare the characters of their partner to be able to make appropriate decision.

Greed: Some are simply greedy and materialistic. In order to satisfy their material cravings they resort to double-dating.

Adventure: They are those who like to have varied experiences in relationship. They want to a “taste” of all of the sensation. This often involves risky behaviours.

Peer Pressure: Most of the time, friends and colleagues influence their peers into unholy acts. These friends will give reasons to justify why you should indulge in the act, insisting that there will be no harm. Eventually, some succumb to the pressure, especially when it is persistent.

There are many other reasons as to why double-dating is prevalent, including economic, broken family and infidelity. In all of these, double-dating cannot be justified as an option. 

It is however has expected consequences that are usually costly.these consequences are,

1. Transmission of STIs: The major consequences of a sexual relationship that is affected by double-dating is sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Having multiple sexual partners exposes one to deadly diseases, as HIV/AIDS, gonorrhea, herpes, etc. which are sexually transmitted diseases.

2. Infidelity: Double-dating in a relationship brings with it the issue of infidelity. The relationship is automatically bedeviled with distrust and if not handled appropriately ends badly.

3. Violence: Once infidelity creeps in as a result of distrust, the relationship may start witnessing violence.

4. Divorce: In marriages, double-dating results to distrust and maybe violence and ultimately in divorce.

5. Emotional trauma: The resultant effect of double-dating is depression. The after effect of a broken relationship or marriage is a emotionally traumatic that could have been blamed for some suicides.

The dangers of double-dating cannot be exhausted. It is however scary that double-dating has become almost an acceptable behaviour in our society. The need to apprehend it becomes necessary now than even, hence every individual must re-evaluate our behaviours to ensure that we do not jeopardize our relationships and lives.

By Maryam Islam