THINGS COUPLES SHOULD UNDERSTAND

Couple should learn to understand and communicate with each other because two biggest things are learning how to fight together more productively and how to communicate in ways that make more sense to both of you.

It can take a long time to learn what your partner's silences mean (and don't mean), that grudges can kill a relationship, and how to adapt to the ups and downs that life is going to throw at you both.

I think every couple should go through at least one really tough time together before they get married, just to see how the other person handles such things.

Now there are two of you not just you anymore, so you have to put the marriage above everything else, and might even forget what you were like when you were single and "free." It's not a bad thing, necessarily. It's just a lot of responsibility, being responsible to someone else.

It's a Constant Work in Progress, you might think once you've finally settled down you can relax and live happily ever after, but nothing can be farther from the truth.

The years jumble together, and if you're not careful you'll easily take the marriage for granted. I think the thing that's made the most difference for marriage is the regular vacations and other traditions—things that force couple to take stock again and again in their relationship and reconnect on a deeper level. Just "being in love" isn't enough to make a marriage work.

Even after decades of living together, you'll be learning things about your partner, bit by bit, that might surprise you, or they'll suddenly change or have different priorities. It's like a dance, and you both have to keep up with each other.

But what a beautiful dance it can be if you follow each other’s steps carefully.

BY SHAMSIYA BARA'U AHMED