The bonds of motherhood.

                                                          

Bonding between a mother and daughter influences our lives in ways we never could imagine.  The relationship between a woman and her mother is so powerful and strong that it affects everything in her life. The mother daughter relationship is the most powerful bond in the world for better or for worse. It is what sets the stage for all other relationships. It is what gives a woman some sense of belonging and enables her build a proper relationship with others in her life. When a woman has a close relationship with her mother, she becomes her Friend and confident. She shares everything in her life with her, his gives her courage and confidence and she does not often become vulnerable. The relationship between mothers and their adult daughters is one in which the two need to work hard to achieve. In the olden days mothers were not close to their daughters; they shied away from discussing intimate issues with them. But these days’ moms are putting in great effort in building strong bonds with their daughters. Some ways to forge strong bonds between mothers and daughter are:

· Doing things together It is very important for moms and daughters to do things together. Doing things together builds a foundation that will enhance a strong relationship between you two. Go out together regularly just the two of you.

Take long walks together make your daughter feel free with you to discuss her issues with you trusting that her secrets are safe with you. Go shopping together, make things together; cakes, cookies, art works. Watch movies together at the cinema or at home, share ideas together.

· Be a good listener
A good listener is reflecting back what the other person is saying. In other not to assume you already know.
When ever you reflect back on what your mother or daughter is saying, you’re telling her that she’s being heard and that you understand.

· Put yourself in her shoes
Address your mom or daughters feelings with empathy and offer a compromise. If you are a daughter think of your mother as a woman with her own wounds and hurts who was born and raised in a different family relationships and issues.

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Don’t bring in third parties
It’s very usual for mothers and daughters to have misunderstanding but they should learn to settle their differences rather than bringing a third party into their conflict. A daughter might report to dad because mom is driving her crazy. Mom might involve another child because she feels she can’t talk to her daughter. Either ways don’t involve a third party instead talk directly to each other when you have the opportunity.


By Maimuna Bagudu.