Grooming a child into becoming a responsible and controllable teenager is the dream of every parent. No parent will want their children to become a problem to them or to the society. Unfortunately, teenagers today exhibit some terrible and frightening behaviours and character that will leave the parent wondering where on earth they got it from. Teenagers who are out of control say rude and nasty things to their parents and even to elderly people around them causing their love ones grief, pains and heartache. Troubled teens hold their families hostage with their disturbing and frightening behaviour making the parents fearful in asserting their powers. It is very important for both parents to always play their role in bringing up a child as proper upbringing can help in reducing teenage crisis. Parents should always spend time with their kids and should always watch who they hang out with. They should always take control of what happen in the home, they should set rules and ensure that those rules are followed and there should be punishment for anybody who breaks them.
There are many reasons why some teens have behavioural problems, it may be due to family problems, peer pressure and other external factors. Addressing some of these concerns will make a great difference in the life of your teens. Some tips in which parents can use in helping their teens come out of teenage crisis include:
Proper Child upbringing: It is important to know that you as a parent set the rules and control the home. Parents should take absolute control of what happens within it even if they can’t have absolute control of what happen outside it. Spending time with your kids should be a number one priority to every parents. Teens whose parents don’t spend time with them will definitely go outside the home to look for company. Try as much as possible to create time even in your busy schedule for your kids. In as much as you love your child, don’t pamper them too much as over pampering can lead to great damage in the life of your child. Remember to always punish wrong doing and rewarding right and good behaviours.
Always set Limits: Setting limit on what your teens can do and what they cannot do is very important in their early age. Teenagers are always curious, eager and conscious of everything that happens around them. Make them understand that there is time for everything and as they grow elder, you can decide on which area you should give room for flexibility. Being too strict to your teens can make them run away
from you and might not approach you with their problems. That is why it is important to always give room for flexibility bearing in mind that your ultimate goal is to release your child to live their own life.
Practice loving and consistent discipline early: Inconsistent discipline encourages kids to test the limits, to see what they can get away with. Discipline apart from love breeds resentment and bitterness. Discipline in a way that your kids know exactly what the rules are and what to expect when they break them. Above all, assure them of your unending love and support even when you are disappointed by their actions. Set rules with well understood consequences: Set certain rules and make sure that your teens know and understand the boundaries. Explain to them that you as their parent, your number one priority is for them to be safe and that the rules are set in other to keep them safe. Tell them the consequences that will follow if any rule is broken and be serious about it.
Spend time with your teens: Do fun things together, attend their activities in school and always show interest in what they do. They need more of you at their teenage years. Always apologize to them for your mistakes and make sure you create a safe environment for them to take a risk to grow and be a safe landing place when they fail.
Be Honest in Communicating with them: Be honest with your kid and take the time to always listen to their problem. Keeping an open and honest line of communication is very important for both you and your teen. Always be patient and calm when they upset you.
Encourage individual accomplishment: Never compare your teens with teens or siblings. Comparing your teens with other teens may make them feel that they are not smart or talented. Help them build their self-esteem, as self-esteem is crucial to foster during these stressful teenage years. Each child is unique in his/her own way, make certain that your teen is aware of their talents, abilities and intellectual capabilities.
Monitor their activities on social media: It is very important for parents to monitor the activities of their children online and parents should not expose their children to electronics gadgets like phones or iPad at a very tender age. Doing so may endanger them into getting too exposed and making them do things they are not supposed to do. As teens navigate through these stressful years, let them know that you love them, no matter what happens and that it is okay to make mistakes. The most important thing for a parent is to have the time to be available when your teen needs to talk and to be supportive. Having
a supportive parent helps manage teenage crisis.
By Mercy Kukah
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