THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOVE AND OBSSESSION

 

Many people can't differentiate between love and obsession as the magnitude of the feelings are almost the-same . To be fair, it's easy to confuse the two. Falling in love takes a lot of risk. In order to be in a truly emotionally fulfilling relationship, you need to be able to be vulnerable and allow another person in.

 For a lot of people, that can be pretty scary when you don't know how your partner feels. This state of the unknown can create a feeling of anxiety that won't really go away until you know for sure that your partner reciprocates your feelings. 

In a healthy relationship, both partners will be able to say how they're feeling and that anxiety would go away when that is established . But if that feeling of anxiety is still there, it can lead to obsession. So if your partner does any of these things,  it may not be love but obsession: 

1, 

Moving things too fast in the relationship  : 

 When someone is obsessed and not in love  the actions they take will most likely be driven by an anxiety that's caused by their obsession. "In obsession, we take that jumble of mixed or anticipatory anxiety emotions and shift it into our thinking…For instance, if someone has a fear of losing you, they're going to act in ways that ensure you're not going to leave them. That may include asking for exclusivity or commitment fairly early on in the relationship. More often than not, people are unaware it's happening. They're more likely to associate those anxious feelings of needing someone with love.

2, They do things in order to get your approval: 

Love is reciprocal. There should be a pretty equal amount of give or take. But when someone is obsessed, they're more likely to give more than they take . There motivations behind their giving will come from a place of wanting to please and be approved rather than love.

3, 

You Get the Feeling that they don't completely support you: 

When someone is obsessed with you, they might not like the idea of you growing as a person or having any independence. For instance, if you get a promotion at work, they may not seem as happy and excited for you because they're thinking about how your promotion might change your relationship. But in healthy love, each partner empowers one another to be the best version of themselves. Your partner will be excited for you and will support you as you grow as an individual.

BY STEPHANIE E. HEMEN