We all want a happy life, and we all know
that having a positive attitude feels better than a negative one. But for some
reason, we are all attracted to and can be easily drawn to the negative side.
How do we go about to establish a more positive attitude as a daily habit? It
is important to look at positivity as understanding thoughts or feelings as
optimistic, energetic and productive. This is important whilst we look in
general at positivity and the idea of polarity, black and white! Hot and cold!
Our
emotions literally change our bodies on a cellular level. Many of our
experiences in life are a result of how we interpret and respond to our
surroundings. Fortunately, rather than repressing or trying to “get rid” of
negative feelings, we can choose to interpret and respond to them differently.
You’ll find that with some practice, patience, and perseverance, you can become
more positive.
First of all, you need to identify the
problem. You can't change the way you think if you can't (or won’t) identify
the problem. Accepting that you have negative thoughts and feelings, and that
you don’t enjoy how you are currently responding to them, can help you begin
the process of change. Try not to judge yourself for your thoughts or feelings.
Remember: the thoughts that pop up or the feelings you experience are not
inherently “good” or “bad,” they are just thoughts and feelings. What you can
control is how you interpret and respond to them.
Accept the things about yourself that you
can’t change, too. For example, if you are an introverted person who needs
quiet time alone to “recharge,” trying to be an extrovert all the time will
probably just make you feel drained and unhappy. Accept yourself for who you
are right now, just as you are. You can then feel free to develop that self into
the most positive self you can be!
Keep
things simple, get back to the basics that you already know work well for you
but have for some reason fallen by the wayside. Stop trying to come up with the
perfect plan before you get started. Instead, come up with a good plan and then
take action on it. You can always readjust along the way towards your goal. And
it’s a whole better with a good plan that you actually take action on than a
perfect one that you just keep polishing for weeks, months or years. Focus on
what matters the most – the tasks and steps forward, Like the first plan in your day and if
possible first thing in your week (when you are likely most rested and
clearheaded). Do just one thing at a time to do the best and most focused job
you can. No matter if it’s at work, in school or in your personal life. Trying
to do several things at once usually just leads to mediocre results or
half-finished jobs.
Be grateful, gratitude is more than a
feeling, it’s a doing. It changes your perspective almost immediately, and the
rewards keep growing the more you practice. Gratitude helps you feel more
positive, enhances your relationships with others, encourages compassion, and
increases feelings of happiness. Some people are naturally higher in “trait gratitude,”
the natural state of feeling thankful. However, you can foster an “attitude of
gratitude” no matter what level of “trait gratitude” you naturally have! In
relationships and situations, avoid approaching them like you “deserve”
something from them. This doesn’t mean that you believe you deserve nothing,
and it doesn’t mean you put up with mistreatment or disrespect. It just means
that you should try to approach things without feeling like you’re “entitled”
to a certain result, action, or benefit. Sharing your feelings of gratitude
with others helps you “set” those feelings in your memory. It can also inspire
positive feelings in the people you share with.
Make an effort to recognize all the little
positive things that happen throughout the day. Keep good memories, humans have
a bad tendency to focus on the negative stuff and let the positive things slide
right past us. When you note the positive things in your life, take a moment to
mindfully acknowledge them. Try to “store them” in your memory. Be optimistic, Optimism
is a way of interpreting the world. Thanks to the human brain’s flexibility,
you can learn different ways of interpreting! Pessimistic outlooks view the
world in unchangeable, internalized terms: “Everything is unfair,” “I’ll never
be able to change this” while an optimistic outlook views the world in
flexible, limited terms.
On a final note, positive affirmations and
visualizations is key. Practice seeing yourself in a positive and confident
light. Do this whenever you have a few minutes to yourself; Self-affirmations, list
of positive statements about yourself and your self-image. This is a simple and
powerful tool to train your subconscious to see yourself in a positive light.
This is important, as many of us can be so hard on ourselves through social
conditioning. I am guilty of being extra tough on myself, but have learned over
time to recognize my gifts rather than finding false and self-imposed
inadequacies.
By Umaru Maryam Hadejia
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