Monday, 14 July 2014

REAL ISSUES FOR REAL WOMEN

My baby”- a personal experience. 
 
It was past 10 at night when I started feeling the contractions. I informed the senior wife as I didn’t want to alert my husband to a false alarm. As it was my first pregnancy, I was nervous and excited.
Our husband however, caught a hint and came to my room where we were deliberating. He wouldn't take risks he said, so off we went to our neighbourhood clinic. As was usual, I was taken in for examination. Being my first experience it was so awful that I can't describe the feeling.
She told me the baby was still far off so, I could wait or go home. I decided to go home. But around 1a.m, my water broke so I had to return to the clinic.
My labour wasn't very active, so that by 4pm I had to be put on a drip to Induce active labour. It continued till the next morning. The next morning, the doctor examined me a number of times; simultaneously taking the foetal heart beat. Before the last examination, he told me that if he found that the baby hadn't progressed significantly, then I would have to undergo a caesarean section.
After yet another harrowing examination, he explained to me that I had to undergo a caesarean section immediately. I was shocked but not utterly. For a long time before then I had thought that a woman could never undergo a caesarean section if the scan showed that the baby's head was positioned downwards. This opinion got changed when I was told of a woman's experience. While she was at home, the baby's head had already started coming out. But when she got to the clinic, she was unable to push. So she had to be operated upon.
Knowing this, I was still surprised, but not completely. I was also disappointed because I wanted to experience the fascinating process of delivering naturally. Though I was also relieved to know that the labour pain would soon be over. Then I was happy, that finally the 9months wait was over. I would behold my baby and begin a new life as a mother.
They disinfected my pubic area and shaved it. Then I was carried to the theatre. I was still experiencing painful contractions even though I was no longer on a drip.
I was injected in my spine. They told me I would be awake during the process. This frightened me. I couldn't imagine seeing all that blood. They reassured me, but I was still afraid.
The first cut was painful, and then the second cut too. I couldn't bear it so I protested. They bulged and injected me through the drip. Before long, I had blanked out. In fleeting consciousness, I felt it as I was being carried and laid on the bed. Then I heard the baby's cry. He made It. Alhamdulillah! I could move my limbs and mouth. Eventually I could open my eyes so I motioned for my baby to be brought closer. He had curly black hair. I asked for his sex and was told he was a boy. When I regained full consciousness, I was told he had been taken to the Intensive care unit.
 A few days later, a family friend and doctor in the company of my husband, mother and 2 others, gave me the news that I had lost him after delivery, due to some complications after birth.
Painful! Really painful! But as a Muslim I could not but absorb the words of comfort drawn from Islamic principle that were uttered by the sister In Islam who broke the news. I still remember her words of comfort, forcing its way to my heart. It was likened to the struggle of limbs with a deep bloody wound struggling from receiving healing from the certain yet stinging mentholated spirit.
With time my heart yielded, I felt the sting as well as the pause in my concurrent weeping.
What a memory! Mummy... Mummy I cried as I held on to her.
Then I shan't forget too, by God's will, those words of comfort.
Dr Adigun knew the Importance of the words I needed. So, despite being a woman and mother herself, she didn’t allow herself to be overcome by emotion.
She encouraged me that I wasn't a failure. But that rather, I was successful, because when a parent loses their child, the parent is rewarded with Al-jannah. She also said that that moment was the moment to declare my faith. I had to accept Allah's decree that supersedes our will. She explained that I shouldn't wait till much later when I’d exhausted my tears and grief. She said my submission had to be Immediate. Amidst her words of comfort came torrents of fresh tears. I couldn't help it. She implored me not to think of the 9months of pregnancy.
Alhamdulillah, the tears ceased for the moment. I requested for a meal and soon I ate.
I got back home after a few days. A week after the surgery, I went back to the clinic to remove only the plaster, my stitches were not the kind you removed. They also cleaned my wound. Soon I became ill with malaria and felt faint one day. I went for blood transfusion-a pack. Afterwards I drank ugwu leaves juice alternated with malt and milk.
A lovely matron and friend of the family came around frequently. She taught them how to massage my breast without forcing the milk out. I remember shedding a few tears when I saw my breast milk fall.
 Anyway, Alhamdulillah, the full breast soon subsided as well as the malaria and the ache from the wound. I gradually regained my health and appetite.

That's my story. Painful Induction; a caesarean section; no baby.

But you know what? I'm alive plus many a woman with such experiences have had baby/ies) afterwards and Insha’Allah I'll be rewarded by Allah.
                                                                                                                                      

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